Posts Tagged ‘old vampires

15
May
17

Queries


*** DISCLAIMER – THIS BLOG IS FICTION AND THE AUTHOR IS NOT LIABLE FOR THE ACTIONS OF ANYONE WHO PERSISTS IN THINKING IT IS NOT FICTION ***

Querents sometimes ask questions of me at parties. Sometimes this is because the information or resolution they require is too sensitive to be entrusted to a letter. These types of queries are researched into and I reply by word of mouth.

Often the queries are not as sensitive as the querent thinks, but I treat all queries as the querent does.

While I have a computer at my office, it is mainly used to answer queries from Michelle, who has my old job at the prison and it is also used to write this blog.

If an Old Vampire sent an enquiry by computer I would answer it by computer.

At the moment that is impossible as Michelle and I are the only Old Vampires who have computers. Most of Michelle’s queries are about them as we cannot have her human colleagues at the prison having more knowledge of computers than she does.

A record of my answer always goes to The Ruler’s Men who collect it in person. If I have advised the querent by word of mouth I write the answer out in the presence of The Ruler’s Men and give them the only copy.

Unfortunately the queries are often to do with what laws we can pass against werewolves. I hear them out and pass them on to The Ruler’s Men as laws are not my remit. I suspect they have a special file for them.

On rare occasions the queries are truly sensitive. These involve information of which it would be injurious or very expensive to the querent if the information were to become public knowledge.

Glossary

Bonded Wedding Old Vampire marriage for political reasons

Common Status the point at where an Old Vampire becomes a real Vampire

Debutante Vampires before Dracula came out, vampires who had been newly turned vampire were taught the rules of society. They then “came out” when they were deemed presentable to vampire society as debutantes. They are the only Old Vampires who have a zero level of Status and are acceptable.

The Committee see The Committee to Regulate Non-Human Activity

The Committee to Regulate Non-Human Activity a committee that meets monthly and talks about affairs to do with werewolves, vampires and humans

Fence an Old Vampire fight in which they fight to the first blood using fencing

The Hunters see Vampire Hunters

Negatives Old Vampires with zero or negative points of Status.

New Vampires vampires who do not want to be Old Vampires, often live as Goths and hold down jobs. This started after Dracula came out.

Notice the Status Keeper serves a Notice on an Old Vampire whose Status has reduced to zero that they are in danger of becoming a Negative

Obligation when one vampire is under an obligation from another s/he has to do as they say

Old Vampires vampires who are polite society. Either turned vampire before Dracula came out or were turned after by an Old Vampire and decided to join the Old Vampires.

Parent the vampire who brought you up (if you are an Old Vampire) in polite society

The Ruler’s Men people employed by The Ruler to do anything she or he asks

Shun a vampire who has committed a sex crime is shunned on their release

Sire the vampire who made you a vampire

Status a ranking system which denotes whether you are an acceptable member of Old Vampire society, which is if you have plus points of status. See Negatives and Thousands

Status Keeper the Old Vampire in charge of the Status points

Thousands Old Vampires whose Status is over a hundred points

Vampire Hunters New vampires who hunt down those vampires who have committed crimes

Vampire Servants servants who are vampires themselves. Mostly Old Vampires, one of their functions is to repeat information and gossip to the Old Vampires they serve

Walk into the sun a euphemism for suicide

26
Apr
17

Reduction in Posting


*** DISCLAIMER – THIS BLOG IS FICTION AND THE AUTHOR IS NOT LIABLE FOR THE ACTIONS OF ANYONE WHO PERSISTS IN THINKING IT IS NOT FICTION ***

It has been noted that the posts of this blog have decreased to bi-weekly and readers have been asking why.

I would prefer to write a weekly post, but the increased influx of requests coming into my office to be dealt with, plus Old Vampires now expect their requests to be dealt with more promptly now the telephone is commonplace in our lives, means that my workload is greater.

Sometimes I get requests from New Vampires. These requests are generated because they are not getting satisfaction from their representative. It expands my sphere of influence to answer them as best as I can.

If an Old Vampire was not getting satisfaction from one of my answers (this does happen from time to time) they would appeal to The Ruler’s Men, who would investigate.

Such investigations are always time consuming. Sometimes the result is that I am cleared, other times I am found to be at fault and corrective action is taken.

I am expected to have enough time to do my job as Old Vampire Representative on The Committee.

If I do not have time, then I have to take it up with The Ruler’s Men and account for every second of my night.

Thankfully The Ruler did not specify how often I was to write this blog, so I write it around my other duties.

I hope my work will consume less of my time and I will be able to write more.

Maybe soon that the party season is nearly over as the nights are waning with the day’s increase, I will then be able to write more.

I remind the reader of this blog that parties are work for Old Vampires.

Few of the questions I am asked, especially as the night grows old, are pertinent. Of the ones that are pertinent, the querent needs to ask but would not dare to write a letter.

Glossary

Bonded Wedding Old Vampire marriage for political reasons

Common Status the point at where an Old Vampire becomes a real Vampire

Debutante Vampires before Dracula came out, vampires who had been newly turned vampire were taught the rules of society. They then “came out” when they were deemed presentable to vampire society as debutantes. They are the only Old Vampires who have a zero level of Status and are acceptable.

The Committee see The Committee to Regulate Non-Human Activity

The Committee to Regulate Non-Human Activity a committee that meets monthly and talks about affairs to do with werewolves, vampires and humans

Fence an Old Vampire fight in which they fight to the first blood using fencing

The Hunters see Vampire Hunters

Negatives Old Vampires with zero or negative points of Status.

New Vampires vampires who do not want to be Old Vampires, often live as Goths and hold down jobs. This started after Dracula came out.

Notice the Status Keeper serves a Notice on an Old Vampire whose Status has reduced to zero that they are in danger of becoming a Negative

Obligation when one vampire is under an obligation from another s/he has to do as they say

Old Vampires vampires who are polite society. Either turned vampire before Dracula came out or were turned after by an Old Vampire and decided to join the Old Vampires.

Parent the vampire who brought you up (if you are an Old Vampire) in polite society

The Ruler’s Men people employed by The Ruler to do anything she or he asks

Shun a vampire who has committed a sex crime is shunned on their release

Sire the vampire who made you a vampire

Status a ranking system which denotes whether you are an acceptable member of Old Vampire society, which is if you have plus points of status. See Negatives and Thousands

Status Keeper the Old Vampire in charge of the Status points

Thousands Old Vampires whose Status is over a hundred points

Vampire Hunters New vampires who hunt down those vampires who have committed crimes

Vampire Servants servants who are vampires themselves. Mostly Old Vampires, one of their functions is to repeat information and gossip to the Old Vampires they serve

Walk into the sun a euphemism for suicide

31
Mar
17

Jeremy


*** DISCLAIMER – THIS BLOG IS FICTION AND THE AUTHOR IS NOT LIABLE FOR THE ACTIONS OF ANYONE WHO PERSISTS IN THINKING IT IS NOT FICTION ***

Jeremy

It has come to my attention that Jeremy had drink poured over him at a very prestigious party by a mere footman.

This was, of course, an accident, but as the night got older the accidents went on.

A servant carving meat accidentally cut his clothing; his glass was dropped just before his hand reached it and mud was kicked over him.

Jeremy was furious and complained to the Old Vampires who were giving the party and demanded satisfaction.

They summoned their butler and asked him to account for such goings-on, whereas the butler informed them that Jeremy had dragged a Servant into his divorce and she had to summon the Human Police as she could not be expected to deal with an Old Vampire, especially not on her own.

It is not the done thing to involve Servants in our affairs except if they are buying information for us. So his hosts immediately said that what had happened to Jeremy must have been accidents.

I had been keeping that incident quiet as I had hoped to sell the information on or use it to profit in the divorce, whichever was better. Now it has lost its currency.

Jeremy was furious. He shouted and swore at his hosts and shortly found himself outside the grounds of the castle.

I have heard that his invitations to parties and events have dried up as such behaviour in Old Vampire society is not to be tolerated.

Since this event I have had less censure and derision to deal with as public opinion is swinging in my favour.

Society will now wait and see what The Judge rules in my divorce and then decide that they agreed with the ruling all along.

Glossary

Bonded Wedding Old Vampire marriage for political reasons

Common Status the point at where an Old Vampire becomes a real Vampire

Debutante Vampires before Dracula came out, vampires who had been newly turned vampire were taught the rules of society. They then “came out” when they were deemed presentable to vampire society as debutantes. They are the only Old Vampires who have a zero level of Status and are acceptable.

The Committee see The Committee to Regulate Non-Human Activity

The Committee to Regulate Non-Human Activity a committee that meets monthly and talks about affairs to do with werewolves, vampires and humans

Fence an Old Vampire fight in which they fight to the first blood using fencing

The Hunters see Vampire Hunters

Negatives Old Vampires with zero or negative points of Status.

New Vampires vampires who do not want to be Old Vampires, often live as Goths and hold down jobs. This started after Dracula came out.

Notice the Status Keeper serves a Notice on an Old Vampire whose Status has reduced to zero that they are in danger of becoming a Negative

Obligation when one vampire is under an obligation from another s/he has to do as they say

Old Vampires vampires who are polite society. Either turned vampire before Dracula came out or were turned after by an Old Vampire and decided to join the Old Vampires.

Parent the vampire who brought you up (if you are an Old Vampire) in polite society

The Ruler’s Men people employed by The Ruler to do anything she or he asks

Shun a vampire who has committed a sex crime is shunned on their release

Sire the vampire who made you a vampire

Status a ranking system which denotes whether you are an acceptable member of Old Vampire society, which is if you have plus points of status. See Negatives and Thousands

Status Keeper the Old Vampire in charge of the Status points

Thousands Old Vampires whose Status is over a hundred points

Vampire Hunters New vampires who hunt down those vampires who have committed crimes

Vampire Servants servants who are vampires themselves. Mostly Old Vampires, one of their functions is to repeat information and gossip to the Old Vampires they serve

Walk into the sun a euphemism for suicide

16
Feb
17

Initiating Proceedings


*** DISCLAIMER – THIS BLOG IS FICTION AND THE AUTHOR IS NOT LIABLE FOR THE ACTIONS OF ANYONE WHO PERSISTS IN THINKING IT IS NOT FICTION ***

Initiating Proceedings

I have initiated divorce proceedings today so I can divorce Jeremy. It has taken me a while to research Old Vampire Judges so I can have someone who will hear my case.

A Judge is one of the few respectable professions in Old Vampire society, as we need people who can step in when a fence has finished and one of the parties involved is not happy with the result. People killing one another means less revenue for The Ruler.

The unhappy party can take his or her case before the Judge, who will hear from both parties and pronounce the finding, which will inform both parties what is needed to be done, or if nothing is to be done, then the judge will say that one or other party was “in the right”, which means correct in what they did.

All parties have to abide by the Judge’s finding and take the matter no further. I have never heard of an Old Vampire who did take the matter further. If they did, the Judge would be within their rights to kill them.

Every Old Vampire Judge will be chomping at the bit to hear this case as it is breaking new ground, so I had to be very careful who I chose as they would all say they were the correct person to hear the case.

Everyone including The Judges will think it is a great scandal. The Judges will not care as long as they are the one to hear it.

Unfortunately this means that the unchosen Judges will be enemies of mine and I do not have the means to convince them otherwise.

The Judge I chose is Henry Mortimer. He has a record of hearing “unusual” cases and nearly all of the parties heard by him report satisfaction with the judgement.

We have set a date for a hearing and he is going to contact Jeremy. Jeremy will not be happy, but he will have to abide by the judge’s ruling. If he does not turn up he will forfeit all.

Glossary

Bonded Wedding Old Vampire marriage for political reasons

Common Status the point at where an Old Vampire becomes a real Vampire

Debutante Vampires before Dracula came out, vampires who had been newly turned vampire were taught the rules of society. They then “came out” when they were deemed presentable to vampire society as debutantes. They are the only Old Vampires who have a zero level of Status and are acceptable.

The Committee see The Committee to Regulate Non-Human Activity

The Committee to Regulate Non-Human Activity a committee that meets monthly and talks about affairs to do with werewolves, vampires and humans

Fence an Old Vampire fight in which they fight to the first blood using fencing

The Hunters see Vampire Hunters

Negatives Old Vampires with zero or negative points of Status.

New Vampires vampires who do not want to be Old Vampires, often live as Goths and hold down jobs. This started after Dracula came out.

Notice the Status Keeper serves a Notice on an Old Vampire whose Status has reduced to zero that they are in danger of becoming a Negative

Obligation when one vampire is under an obligation from another s/he has to do as they say

Old Vampires vampires who are polite society. Either turned vampire before Dracula came out or were turned after by an Old Vampire and decided to join the Old Vampires.

Parent the vampire who brought you up (if you are an Old Vampire) in polite society

The Ruler’s Men people employed by The Ruler to do anything she or he asks

Shun a vampire who has committed a sex crime is shunned on their release

Sire the vampire who made you a vampire

Status a ranking system which denotes whether you are an acceptable member of Old Vampire society, which is if you have plus points of status. See Negatives and Thousands

Status Keeper the Old Vampire in charge of the Status points

Thousands Old Vampires whose Status is over a hundred points

Vampire Hunters New vampires who hunt down those vampires who have committed crimes

Vampire Servants servants who are vampires themselves. Mostly Old Vampires, one of their functions is to repeat information and gossip to the Old Vampires they serve

Walk into the sun a euphemism for suicide

02
Feb
17

Irritation


*** DISCLAIMER – THIS BLOG IS FICTION AND THE AUTHOR IS NOT LIABLE FOR THE ACTIONS OF ANYONE WHO PERSISTS IN THINKING IT IS NOT FICTION ***

I find my servant Jane irritating at times, but not as much as I did my husband, who irritated me so much that I could have screamed at him.

Jane’s drink preferences and singing are all that irritates me about her and the odd irritation from a good servant must be endured, although I have put an embargo on all Christmas music until December begins.

Jane has started singing the latest songs from the hit parade instead, which I cannot say is much of an improvement.

My husband irritated me by locking himself in his study and did not communicate what he was doing or whom he was writing letters to.

I had to wait and find out the consequences of his actions, never dreaming that he would choose to walk away from all he had to “find himself”.

This itself irritates me beyond belief as in the first case, it is ridiculous for an Old Vampire to do.

It would not be beneath a New Vampire to ape humans like this, which they are wont to do.

In the second case, I was left to pick up the pieces and pay all his debts.

I had been treated as the little woman in this marriage for all of my life, not allowed to know what was going on and having to be content to sit and entertain guests.

It more than irritates me that he expected to come back and find everything as before with card decks out on green tables.

I, who have always gambled have not even picked up a deck of cards for years. Jane aids me in scrupulously keeping the house free of such things.

I am gradually building up investments and a portfolio, so I can return to owning a castle and having more than one servant.

I have my own life now; even though it is not the life an Old Vampire should have, it is mine.

Glossary

Bonded Wedding Old Vampire marriage for political reasons

Common Status the point at where an Old Vampire becomes a real Vampire

Debutante Vampires before Dracula came out, vampires who had been newly turned vampire were taught the rules of society. They then “came out” when they were deemed presentable to vampire society as debutantes. They are the only Old Vampires who have a zero level of Status and are acceptable.

The Committee see The Committee to Regulate Non-Human Activity

The Committee to Regulate Non-Human Activity a committee that meets monthly and talks about affairs to do with werewolves, vampires and humans

Fence an Old Vampire fight in which they fight to the first blood using fencing

The Hunters see Vampire Hunters

Negatives Old Vampires with zero or negative points of Status.

New Vampires vampires who do not want to be Old Vampires, often live as Goths and hold down jobs. This started after Dracula came out.

Notice the Status Keeper serves a Notice on an Old Vampire whose Status has reduced to zero that they are in danger of becoming a Negative

Obligation when one vampire is under an obligation from another s/he has to do as they say

Old Vampires vampires who are polite society. Either turned vampire before Dracula came out or were turned after by an Old Vampire and decided to join the Old Vampires.

Parent the vampire who brought you up (if you are an Old Vampire) in polite society

The Ruler’s Men people employed by The Ruler to do anything she or he asks

Shun a vampire who has committed a sex crime is shunned on their release

Sire the vampire who made you a vampire

Status a ranking system which denotes whether you are an acceptable member of Old Vampire society, which is if you have plus points of status. See Negatives and Thousands

Status Keeper the Old Vampire in charge of the Status points

Thousands Old Vampires whose Status is over a hundred points

Vampire Hunters New vampires who hunt down those vampires who have committed crimes

Vampire Servants servants who are vampires themselves. Mostly Old Vampires, one of their functions is to repeat information and gossip to the Old Vampires they serve

Walk into the sun a euphemism for suicide

25
Jan
17

Initiating Divorce


*** DISCLAIMER – THIS BLOG IS FICTION AND THE AUTHOR IS NOT LIABLE FOR THE ACTIONS OF ANYONE WHO PERSISTS IN THINKING IT IS NOT FICTION ***

I have thought long and hard about the situation with my husband and have decided to divorce Jeremy.

This is a decision that will scandalise all Old Vampires. The result of it will be that some will invite me to their parties for entertainment, while some will stop invitations due to my divorce.

I have lived for twenty eight years without him. Some of the mistakes I have made I would not have made with him there; I daresay I would have made others had I been with him.

I have carved out a life without him and found independence that I find hard to give up.

If I acknowledge him as my husband I will have to find a place in my house for him.

I do not want that. I have lived in my small house, made it mine and now to share it with someone other than a servant is unbearable.

I will never know the whys or wherefores of his actions, which irritate me, and had done for a long time before he left.

He will be tramping around the house at odd hours; either that or locking himself inside his study.

I confess that when he last disappeared I was hoping the mobs had got him so I would be free, but he turned up a century later in Norway.

This will not be an easy process to do. It will be easy to start things off as any Old Vampire Judge will be champing at the bit to be the first to hear the case.

The Judge I choose will certainly not dissuade me from my course of action.

Neither myself nor Jeremy will come out of it well and I am sure my Status will diminish, but at the end of it I will be my own woman for the first time in my life.

This is why I became an Old Vampire, but instead I chose one set of fetters over another.

Glossary

Bonded Wedding Old Vampire marriage for political reasons

Common Status the point at where an Old Vampire becomes a real Vampire

Debutante Vampires before Dracula came out, vampires who had been newly turned vampire were taught the rules of society. They then “came out” when they were deemed presentable to vampire society as debutantes. They are the only Old Vampires who have a zero level of Status and are acceptable.

The Committee see The Committee to Regulate Non-Human Activity

The Committee to Regulate Non-Human Activity a committee that meets monthly and talks about affairs to do with werewolves, vampires and humans

Fence an Old Vampire fight in which they fight to the first blood using fencing

The Hunters see Vampire Hunters

Negatives Old Vampires with zero or negative points of Status.

New Vampires vampires who do not want to be Old Vampires, often live as Goths and hold down jobs. This started after Dracula came out.

Notice the Status Keeper serves a Notice on an Old Vampire whose Status has reduced to zero that they are in danger of becoming a Negative

Obligation when one vampire is under an obligation from another s/he has to do as they say

Old Vampires vampires who are polite society. Either turned vampire before Dracula came out or were turned after by an Old Vampire and decided to join the Old Vampires.

Parent the vampire who brought you up (if you are an Old Vampire) in polite society

The Ruler’s Men people employed by The Ruler to do anything she or he asks

Shun a vampire who has committed a sex crime is shunned on their release

Sire the vampire who made you a vampire

Status a ranking system which denotes whether you are an acceptable member of Old Vampire society, which is if you have plus points of status. See Negatives and Thousands

Status Keeper the Old Vampire in charge of the Status points

Thousands Old Vampires whose Status is over a hundred points

Vampire Hunters New vampires who hunt down those vampires who have committed crimes

Vampire Servants servants who are vampires themselves. Mostly Old Vampires, one of their functions is to repeat information and gossip to the Old Vampires they serve

Walk into the sun a euphemism for suicide

12
Jan
17

Work and Play


*** DISCLAIMER – THIS BLOG IS FICTION AND THE AUTHOR IS NOT LIABLE FOR THE ACTIONS OF ANYONE WHO PERSISTS IN THINKING IT IS NOT FICTION ***

I have been absent from this blog for too long and have recently been reminded about my writing duties.

I have, of course, been partying and enjoying the season without having to get up in the daytime to go to w.o.r.k. and have found it even more enjoyable now I can sleep after the parties.

Since I no longer work in the daytime I have more invitations to parties and am able to accept more. For an Old Vampire there is no such thing as accepting too many invitations.

So the blood flowed and I talked to allies and enemies alike and bought and sold information.

I felt like an Old Vampire again for the first time in a long time, although I did have to put down a few jabs about living in a semi-detached house. Some of those were from Jeremy. Since he is my husband I was obliged to offer to take him with me to all invitations I had accepted, which is something that irked me greatly.

Let me reassure some of you that I have been in to the office to process paperwork and deal with any messages left for me, but an Old Vampire always works at parties and I got a lot of work done.

Few messages were left for me at my office when people could stop me at a party and ask.

Most of what I deal with are trivial queries which can be answered in a minute. If the querent asks me face to face it does not require any paperwork on my part.

Few matters require much time and attention, but the position of Old Vampire Representative on The Committee needs to be filled for such as those and to liaise with other representatives, which keeps we undead hidden from humans, who would rise up and kill us if they knew we existed and how many of them we kill.

Glossary

Bonded Wedding Old Vampire marriage for political reasons

Common Status the point at where an Old Vampire becomes a real Vampire

Debutante Vampires before Dracula came out, vampires who had been newly turned vampire were taught the rules of society. They then “came out” when they were deemed presentable to vampire society as debutantes. They are the only Old Vampires who have a zero level of Status and are acceptable.

The Committee see The Committee to Regulate Non-Human Activity

The Committee to Regulate Non-Human Activity a committee that meets monthly and talks about affairs to do with werewolves, vampires and humans

Fence an Old Vampire fight in which they fight to the first blood using fencing

The Hunters see Vampire Hunters

Negatives Old Vampires with zero or negative points of Status.

New Vampires vampires who do not want to be Old Vampires, often live as Goths and hold down jobs. This started after Dracula came out.

Notice the Status Keeper serves a Notice on an Old Vampire whose Status has reduced to zero that they are in danger of becoming a Negative

Obligation when one vampire is under an obligation from another s/he has to do as they say

Old Vampires vampires who are polite society. Either turned vampire before Dracula came out or were turned after by an Old Vampire and decided to join the Old Vampires.

Parent the vampire who brought you up (if you are an Old Vampire) in polite society

The Ruler’s Men people employed by The Ruler to do anything she or he asks

Shun a vampire who has committed a sex crime is shunned on their release

Sire the vampire who made you a vampire

Status a ranking system which denotes whether you are an acceptable member of Old Vampire society, which is if you have plus points of status. See Negatives and Thousands

Status Keeper the Old Vampire in charge of the Status points

Thousands Old Vampires whose Status is over a hundred points

Vampire Hunters New vampires who hunt down those vampires who have committed crimes

Vampire Servants servants who are vampires themselves. Mostly Old Vampires, one of their functions is to repeat information and gossip to the Old Vampires they serve

Walk into the sun a euphemism for suicide




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