Archive for the 'Vampire Life' Category

05
Nov
17

Aftermath


*** DISCLAIMER – THIS BLOG IS FICTION AND THE AUTHOR IS NOT LIABLE FOR THE ACTIONS OF ANYONE WHO PERSISTS IN THINKING IT IS NOT FICTION ***

Affairs are still settling down after the news of my divorce got out.  I am still an object of whispers and to some I am known as “that woman” while I hear that my Judge has not had to pay for his food since.

There are two divorces which have now been brought before Judges, but I hear those are more difficult cases as both parties are still living with one another.

I suspect our Ruler is letting the Judges make the law on divorce, as this is a matter between one subject and another; it will not affect the tax he collects.

Andy, the Human Police Representative on The Committee, congratulated me on my divorce at a Committee meeting.

Privately he has said that he thought Jeremy was “a piece of work”.  I have had to do a lot of research to find out what he meant.

The others at The Committee received the news with different feelings.  Saskia who is the Werewolf Representative is firmly against it, while Nosferatu who is the New Vampire Representative mentioned that New Vampires do not get married.

I retorted with the fact that New Vampires do not do much of anything and asked if he’d been to see Columbine lately, who is a New Vampire in the prison.  He changed the subject.

My servant Jane is starting to return from her nights off in more of her usual neat state, rather than looking worse for wear.

My desk is filled with letters about my divorce.  Some congratulatory and some filled with hatred and bile.  These last are anonymous and I have consigned them to the wastepaper bin.

Then there are others criticising and questioning what I did.  I have formulated a stock letter to reply to these as while I must reply to every letter I would not be paid for these.

Glossary

Bonded Wedding Old Vampire marriage for political reasons

Common Status the point at where an Old Vampire becomes a real Vampire

Debutante Vampires before Dracula came out, vampires who had been newly turned vampire were taught the rules of society.  They then “came out” when they were deemed presentable to vampire society as debutantes.  They are the only Old Vampires who have a zero level of Status and are acceptable.

The Committee see The Committee to Regulate Non-Human Activity

The Committee to Regulate Non-Human Activity a committee that meets monthly and talks about affairs to do with werewolves, vampires and humans

Fence an Old Vampire fight in which they fight to the first blood using fencing

The Hunters see Vampire Hunters

Negatives Old Vampires with zero or negative points of Status.

New Vampires vampires who do not want to be Old Vampires, often live as Goths and hold down jobs.  This started after Dracula came out.

Notice the Status Keeper serves a Notice on an Old Vampire whose Status has reduced to zero that they are in danger of becoming a Negative

Obligation when one vampire is under an obligation from another s/he has to do as they say

Old Vampires vampires who are polite society.  Either turned vampire before Dracula came out or were turned after by an Old Vampire and decided to join the Old Vampires.

Parent the vampire who brought you up (if you are an Old Vampire) in polite society

The Ruler’s Men people employed by The Ruler to do anything she or he asks

Shun a vampire who has committed a sex crime is shunned on their release

Sire the vampire who made you a vampire

Status a ranking system which denotes whether you are an acceptable member of Old Vampire society, which is if you have plus points of status.  See Negatives and Thousands

Status Keeper the Old Vampire in charge of the Status points

Thousands Old Vampires whose Status is over a hundred points

Vampire Hunters New vampires who hunt down those vampires who have committed crimes

Vampire Servants servants who are vampires themselves.  Mostly Old Vampires, one of their functions is to repeat information and gossip to the Old Vampires they serve

Walk into the sun a euphemism for suicide

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29
Oct
17

Party


*** DISCLAIMER – THIS BLOG IS FICTION AND THE AUTHOR IS NOT LIABLE FOR THE ACTIONS OF ANYONE WHO PERSISTS IN THINKING IT IS NOT FICTION ***

The only blot on my party was Michelle.  She is an Old Vampire who has killed prominent humans; not those who would be missed or from self-defence but to see a return to the old ways.

Since she helped catch Michael, the latest Human killer, she has been given my old job in the prison and last night she turned up.

I did not notice her until there was a sudden silence.  I turned around and she was alone in the middle of my living room.  One of my guests must have been playing at footman and let her in.

It was a tricky situation, as I could not turn her out as she had not done anything in my house that I could turn her out for.

So I had to welcome her and play the gracious hostess.  I did so and then informed her that I had given my servant the night off and everyone was taking their turn at being a servant.

I suggested that she take the coats of others and hang them up, as they were lying everywhere.

She drew herself up and opened her mouth, then thought better of it and acquiesced to my plan.  Thankfully that dissolved the atmosphere.

I had to endure murmurs of “this is what happens when you only have one servant” but put them in their place by asking if they were going to invest in one of my financial schemes, so I could afford another servant.

Since I have sunk so low I cannot afford financial schemes they were forced to withdraw rather than admit ignorance.  Of course, this will not endear me to them, but since they were my enemies I will take no further harm than I would have done.

Michelle took the coats with ill grace, flounced off and everyone breathed a sigh of relief.  Someone who has broken our Ruler’s laws is not welcome anywhere.

Glossary

Bonded Wedding Old Vampire marriage for political reasons

Common Status the point at where an Old Vampire becomes a real Vampire

Debutante Vampires before Dracula came out, vampires who had been newly turned vampire were taught the rules of society.  They then “came out” when they were deemed presentable to vampire society as debutantes.  They are the only Old Vampires who have a zero level of Status and are acceptable.

The Committee see The Committee to Regulate Non-Human Activity

The Committee to Regulate Non-Human Activity a committee that meets monthly and talks about affairs to do with werewolves, vampires and humans

Fence an Old Vampire fight in which they fight to the first blood using fencing

The Hunters see Vampire Hunters

Negatives Old Vampires with zero or negative points of Status.

New Vampires vampires who do not want to be Old Vampires, often live as Goths and hold down jobs.  This started after Dracula came out.

Notice the Status Keeper serves a Notice on an Old Vampire whose Status has reduced to zero that they are in danger of becoming a Negative

Obligation when one vampire is under an obligation from another s/he has to do as they say

Old Vampires vampires who are polite society.  Either turned vampire before Dracula came out or were turned after by an Old Vampire and decided to join the Old Vampires.

Parent the vampire who brought you up (if you are an Old Vampire) in polite society

The Ruler’s Men people employed by The Ruler to do anything she or he asks

Shun a vampire who has committed a sex crime is shunned on their release

Sire the vampire who made you a vampire

Status a ranking system which denotes whether you are an acceptable member of Old Vampire society, which is if you have plus points of status.  See Negatives and Thousands

Status Keeper the Old Vampire in charge of the Status points

Thousands Old Vampires whose Status is over a hundred points

Vampire Hunters New vampires who hunt down those vampires who have committed crimes

Vampire Servants servants who are vampires themselves.  Mostly Old Vampires, one of their functions is to repeat information and gossip to the Old Vampires they serve

Walk into the sun a euphemism for suicide

24
Sep
17

Hearing


*** DISCLAIMER – THIS BLOG IS FICTION AND THE AUTHOR IS NOT LIABLE FOR THE ACTIONS OF ANYONE WHO PERSISTS IN THINKING IT IS NOT FICTION ***

I have not been writing for some months now due to my time being taken up by my divorce.

When the hearing started, at first glance Jeremy was perfectly dressed and his representatives carried themselves off so well in the witness box that I was worried.

My representatives did well, but this is the first time any Old Vampire has asked for a divorce and unless there are good reasons for such a divorce then Henry, who is the Judge for my case will refuse me one.

It was my turn to outline my reasons for a divorce; namely that Jeremy does not behave as a husband should.

I had kept the note where he had informed he had gone to “find himself” and it was upon Henry’s receipt of that note that Jeremy began to break down.

He started shaking and denying the evidence, whereupon Henry asked for a handwriting sample which matched the note.

When I outlined the levels to which I had sunk so that I had to sell my castle Jeremy was screaming that it was my gambling habit and not his lack of money that had led me to sell the castle and Henry had him removed from court.

I admitted the gambling habit but was able to provide evidence of the many debtor’s letters which had arrived after Jeremy had left.

There was a discontented rumble around the court at this.  Other Old Vampires have been known to disappear for a few months on an extended holiday, but they always wrap their affairs up beforehand.

Henry received my evidence, sent out to obtain any evidence from Jeremy and summed up by saying that he would look into the case and meanwhile we were not to have any contact with each other.

Unlike the human courts, our Judges personally investigate.

Glossary

Bonded Wedding Old Vampire marriage for political reasons

Common Status the point at where an Old Vampire becomes a real Vampire

Debutante Vampires before Dracula came out, vampires who had been newly turned vampire were taught the rules of society.  They then “came out” when they were deemed presentable to vampire society as debutantes.  They are the only Old Vampires who have a zero level of Status and are acceptable.

The Committee see The Committee to Regulate Non-Human Activity

The Committee to Regulate Non-Human Activity a committee that meets monthly and talks about affairs to do with werewolves, vampires and humans

Fence an Old Vampire fight in which they fight to the first blood using fencing

The Hunters see Vampire Hunters

Negatives Old Vampires with zero or negative points of Status.

New Vampires vampires who do not want to be Old Vampires, often live as Goths and hold down jobs.  This started after Dracula came out.

Notice the Status Keeper serves a Notice on an Old Vampire whose Status has reduced to zero that they are in danger of becoming a Negative

Obligation when one vampire is under an obligation from another s/he has to do as they say

Old Vampires vampires who are polite society.  Either turned vampire before Dracula came out or were turned after by an Old Vampire and decided to join the Old Vampires.

Parent the vampire who brought you up (if you are an Old Vampire) in polite society

The Ruler’s Men people employed by The Ruler to do anything she or he asks

Shun a vampire who has committed a sex crime is shunned on their release

Sire the vampire who made you a vampire

Status a ranking system which denotes whether you are an acceptable member of Old Vampire society, which is if you have plus points of status.  See Negatives and Thousands

Status Keeper the Old Vampire in charge of the Status points

Thousands Old Vampires whose Status is over a hundred points

Vampire Hunters New vampires who hunt down those vampires who have committed crimes

Vampire Servants servants who are vampires themselves.  Mostly Old Vampires, one of their functions is to repeat information and gossip to the Old Vampires they serve

Walk into the sun a euphemism for suicide

24
May
17

Garden


*** DISCLAIMER – THIS BLOG IS FICTION AND THE AUTHOR IS NOT LIABLE FOR THE ACTIONS OF ANYONE WHO PERSISTS IN THINKING IT IS NOT FICTION ***

It may come as a surprise to many readers that I have a garden, as it is the view of many that gardens are to be enjoyed by day and not by night.

This is only because humans are more active in the day. There are many plants which are pollinated by moths and it is these I populate my garden with. I can host quite a convivial gathering there.

Unfortunately my garden is not as big as I am used to it being and I can only host small gatherings.

However, since I carefully select the people who come to these small gatherings my parties are gaining a reputation for exclusivity amongst those who do not refuse out of disgust for an Old Vampire who does not have a castle or is getting a divorce.

Then there are those who attend for curiosity to see the gay divorcee who lives without a castle and dine out on the experience.

These come once and never attend again. However, I often manage to extract some relevant information out of them at the party.

The garden is the backdrop to a successful party. The scent of my jasmine and other flowers sets an exotic stage.

Despite the garden being small, I have made a main area for socialising with secluded nooks and crannies situated off the main area, where people can go to discuss subjects in private.

As the hostess I have to be in attendance much of the time, especially as Jane is my only servant.

This is always much commented on at my parties and I always say that she performs her duties admirably and then change the subject.

Unfortunately I still have to tend my garden by day or the neighbours will talk. This entails getting up early in the evening to prune, weed or move flowers about. A couple of hours of daylight is a small price to pay for a good party.

Glossary

Bonded Wedding Old Vampire marriage for political reasons

Common Status the point at where an Old Vampire becomes a real Vampire

Debutante Vampires before Dracula came out, vampires who had been newly turned vampire were taught the rules of society. They then “came out” when they were deemed presentable to vampire society as debutantes. They are the only Old Vampires who have a zero level of Status and are acceptable.

The Committee see The Committee to Regulate Non-Human Activity

The Committee to Regulate Non-Human Activity a committee that meets monthly and talks about affairs to do with werewolves, vampires and humans

Fence an Old Vampire fight in which they fight to the first blood using fencing

The Hunters see Vampire Hunters

Negatives Old Vampires with zero or negative points of Status.

New Vampires vampires who do not want to be Old Vampires, often live as Goths and hold down jobs. This started after Dracula came out.

Notice the Status Keeper serves a Notice on an Old Vampire whose Status has reduced to zero that they are in danger of becoming a Negative

Obligation when one vampire is under an obligation from another s/he has to do as they say

Old Vampires vampires who are polite society. Either turned vampire before Dracula came out or were turned after by an Old Vampire and decided to join the Old Vampires.

Parent the vampire who brought you up (if you are an Old Vampire) in polite society

The Ruler’s Men people employed by The Ruler to do anything she or he asks

Shun a vampire who has committed a sex crime is shunned on their release

Sire the vampire who made you a vampire

Status a ranking system which denotes whether you are an acceptable member of Old Vampire society, which is if you have plus points of status. See Negatives and Thousands

Status Keeper the Old Vampire in charge of the Status points

Thousands Old Vampires whose Status is over a hundred points

Vampire Hunters New vampires who hunt down those vampires who have committed crimes

Vampire Servants servants who are vampires themselves. Mostly Old Vampires, one of their functions is to repeat information and gossip to the Old Vampires they serve

Walk into the sun a euphemism for suicide

19
Aug
16

Status List


*** DISCLAIMER – THIS BLOG IS FICTION AND THE AUTHOR IS NOT LIABLE FOR THE ACTIONS OF ANYONE WHO PERSISTS IN THINKING IT IS NOT FICTION ***

The list that details our Status has just come in.  I took it to the office I have as Old Vampire Representative on The Committee to peruse it in private.

Such a list goes out to all known Old Vampires, but if I read it at my club, people will insist on interrupting me to discuss it, or peering over my shoulder to see where I’ve got to and then making remarks.

If I attempt to read it at home, my servant Jane will make excuses to be in the room while I do so and try and get a glimpse of it.

Such lists include Old Vampire Servants and she will have received her own copy of it, but for once everyone is in a hurry to know the latest about everyone and in a hurry to know who knows what about everyone and discuss it.

I enjoy the discussions, but prefer to know all, before entering into such discussions, especially when I have not yet read the Status of someone’s Sire, Parent, Allies or Spouse.  So I switch off my telephone at the office and make myself as comfortable as it is possible to do in such surroundings and sit back and read.

This year my Status has gone up and Jane’s has soared.  Hers is still in the bottom third of the lists, but I am happy to say it is looking quite respectable these days.

I suspect mine has gone up because of helping catch the human-killer.  I do not know why Jane’s has gone up; our Servants’ status is a matter for them alone.

It is good to have Servants with a high Status.  Some butlers are in the Thousands and help raise the Status of all those they serve as it reflects well on them.

Having Servants with low Status is never good.  This is a matter of which to delicately enquire of your butler how they may be helped and allow them the requisite time off from their duties.

Glossary

Bonded Wedding Old Vampire marriage for political reasons

Common Status the point at where an Old Vampire becomes a real Vampire

Debutante Vampires before Dracula came out, vampires who had been newly turned vampire were taught the rules of society.  They then “came out” when they were deemed presentable to vampire society as debutantes.  They are the only Old Vampires who have a zero level of Status and are acceptable.

The Committee see The Committee to Regulate Non-Human Activity

The Committee to Regulate Non-Human Activity a committee that meets monthly and talks about affairs to do with werewolves, vampires and humans

Fence an Old Vampire fight in which they fight to the first blood using fencing

The Hunters see Vampire Hunters

Negatives Old Vampires with zero or negative points of Status.

New Vampires vampires who do not want to be Old Vampires, often live as Goths and hold down jobs.  This started after Dracula came out.

Notice the Status Keeper serves a Notice on an Old Vampire whose Status has reduced to zero that they are in danger of becoming a Negative

Obligation when one vampire is under an obligation from another s/he has to do as they say

Old Vampires vampires who are polite society.  Either turned vampire before Dracula came out or were turned after by an Old Vampire and decided to join the Old Vampires.

Parent the vampire who brought you up (if you are an Old Vampire) in polite society

The Ruler’s Men people employed by The Ruler to do anything she or he asks

Shun a vampire who has committed a sex crime is shunned on their release

Sire the vampire who made you a vampire

Status a ranking system which denotes whether you are an acceptable member of Old Vampire society, which is if you have plus points of status.  See Negatives and Thousands

Status Keeper the Old Vampire in charge of the Status points

Thousands Old Vampires whose Status is over a hundred points

Vampire Hunters New vampires who hunt down those vampires who have committed crimes

Vampire Servants servants who are vampires themselves.  Mostly Old Vampires, one of their functions is to repeat information and gossip to the Old Vampires they serve

Walk into the sun a euphemism for suicide

27
Nov
15

Christmas


*** DISCLAIMER – THIS BLOG IS FICTION AND THE AUTHOR IS NOT LIABLE FOR THE ACTIONS OF ANYONE WHO PERSISTS IN THINKING IT IS NOT FICTION ***

My colleagues have already been talking about Christmas, which should be a four-letter word.

I loathe and despise it. Unfortunately my servant Jane as well as my colleagues adore it and the adoration has spread to The Committee.

Nosferatu, the New Vampire Representative, is trying to get us to go out for Christmas drinks.

I have refused, as the Human Police Representative, Andy, and I will have to escort the Old Vampire who killed humans into the prison and make sure his needs are attended to.

Sasha, the Werewolf Representative, is talking about Christmas decorations in our meetings.

Andy has forestalled her by quoting Health and Safety at her. I am quite sure that this is nonsense, but I backed him up as I would like to see one place where there are no decorations.

It will be impossible in my house as Jane is already organising them, as well as Christmas cake and pudding. At least she has stopped moping, however I am not sure that the singing of Christmas carols is an improvement.

I have drawn the line at putting on one of those stupid hats, although I have told Jane that she is at liberty to wear what she wants within the bounds of decency and taste.

At least I have the refuge of my club. I checked with their butler and thankfully the very idea they might have anything to do with Christmas shocked him. I then had to tip him so he would get over the shock.

Unfortunately I am unable to do any work on behalf of Old Vampires in my club, as I cannot risk another Old Vampire “overseeing” any documents that I may be working on.

Otherwise I would be patronising my club every spare moment I have and a lot of moments I don’t have.

Glossary

Bonded Wedding Old Vampire marriage for political reasons

Common Status the point at where an Old Vampire becomes a real Vampire

Debutante Vampires before Dracula came out, vampires who had been newly turned vampire were taught the rules of society. They then “came out” when they were deemed presentable to vampire society as debutantes. They are the only Old Vampires who have a zero level of Status and are acceptable.

The Committee see The Committee to Regulate Non-Human Activity

The Committee to Regulate Non-Human Activity a committee that meets monthly and talks about affairs to do with werewolves, vampires and humans

Fence an Old Vampire fight in which they fight to the first blood using fencing

The Hunters see Vampire Hunters

Negatives Old Vampires with zero or negative points of Status.

New Vampires vampires who do not want to be Old Vampires, often live as Goths and hold down jobs. This started after Dracula came out.

Notice the Status Keeper serves a Notice on an Old Vampire whose Status has reduced to zero that they are in danger of becoming a Negative

Obligation when one vampire is under an obligation from another s/he has to do as they say

Old Vampires vampires who are polite society. Either turned vampire before Dracula came out or were turned after by an Old Vampire and decided to join the Old Vampires.

Parent the vampire who brought you up (if you are an Old Vampire) in polite society

The Ruler’s Men people employed by The Ruler to do anything she or he asks

Shun a vampire who has committed a sex crime is shunned on their release

Sire the vampire who made you a vampire

Status a ranking system which denotes whether you are an acceptable member of Old Vampire society, which is if you have plus points of status. See Negatives and Thousands

Status Keeper the Old Vampire in charge of the Status points

Thousands Old Vampires whose Status is over a hundred points

Vampire Hunters New vampires who hunt down those vampires who have committed crimes

Vampire Servants servants who are vampires themselves. Mostly Old Vampires, one of their functions is to repeat information and gossip to the Old Vampires they serve

Walk into the sun a euphemism for suicide

18
Nov
15

Fights


*** DISCLAIMER – THIS BLOG IS FICTION AND THE AUTHOR IS NOT LIABLE FOR THE ACTIONS OF ANYONE WHO PERSISTS IN THINKING IT IS NOT FICTION ***

I have been resuming training at fencing, as I have not done anything since my last fence, which showed me that my skills were clearly lacking.

We do not need exercise to keep fit as the humans do; we simply are at our peak of fitness.

However, this does not mean that we have the skills needed if it comes down to a fight.

For example, while training for my last fence I was at first not anticipating my opponent’s moves correctly and it was often a very short fight.

This was the first, but not the only thing that we had to correct; I had to work hard and sleep less for those weeks.

I now understand the reasons for Werewolves and Old Vampires choosing to fight one another.

It is not my style to fight someone else unless it is necessary and since these fights are consensual and no humans are involved I do not get involved.

I understand that the Human Police only get involved when a complaint is made and they simply move them on.

Old Vampires only fight one another in exceptional circumstances; otherwise we would decimate ourselves and The Ruler would have no taxes to collect.

I have occasionally come across or been called out to investigate Old Vampire Servants who are training.

Normally Old Vampires do not go near this sort of thing, but if the Human Police are concerned and have called me I will stay and supervise.

The Old Vampire Servants and I are not happy about this, but neither do we want humans involved.

After a few words with them I usually arrange for a more secluded venue for them to train next time.

Anyone else I would have more than a few words with; however Old Vampire Servants are valuable and not to be wasted.

Glossary

Bonded Wedding Old Vampire marriage for political reasons

Common Status the point at where an Old Vampire becomes a real Vampire

Debutante Vampires before Dracula came out, vampires who had been newly turned vampire were taught the rules of society. They then “came out” when they were deemed presentable to vampire society as debutantes. They are the only Old Vampires who have a zero level of Status and are acceptable.

The Committee see The Committee to Regulate Non-Human Activity

The Committee to Regulate Non-Human Activity a committee that meets monthly and talks about affairs to do with werewolves, vampires and humans

Fence an Old Vampire fight in which they fight to the first blood using fencing

The Hunters see Vampire Hunters

Negatives Old Vampires with zero or negative points of Status.

New Vampires vampires who do not want to be Old Vampires, often live as Goths and hold down jobs. This started after Dracula came out.

Notice the Status Keeper serves a Notice on an Old Vampire whose Status has reduced to zero that they are in danger of becoming a Negative

Obligation when one vampire is under an obligation from another s/he has to do as they say

Old Vampires vampires who are polite society. Either turned vampire before Dracula came out or were turned after by an Old Vampire and decided to join the Old Vampires.

Parent the vampire who brought you up (if you are an Old Vampire) in polite society

The Ruler’s Men people employed by The Ruler to do anything she or he asks

Shun a vampire who has committed a sex crime is shunned on their release

Sire the vampire who made you a vampire

Status a ranking system which denotes whether you are an acceptable member of Old Vampire society, which is if you have plus points of status. See Negatives and Thousands

Status Keeper the Old Vampire in charge of the Status points

Thousands Old Vampires whose Status is over a hundred points

Vampire Hunters New vampires who hunt down those vampires who have committed crimes

Vampire Servants servants who are vampires themselves. Mostly Old Vampires, one of their functions is to repeat information and gossip to the Old Vampires they serve

Walk into the sun a euphemism for suicide




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