23
Dec
13

Christmas


*** DISCLAIMER – THIS BLOG IS FICTION AND THE AUTHOR IS NOT LIABLE FOR THE ACTIONS OF ANYONE WHO PERSISTS IN THINKING IT IS NOT FICTION ***

I am not looking forward to this Christmas.  I have never liked this celebration of sweet family life and I much preferred it when it was purely a religious festival.

Most Old Vampires do not like it, but my servant Jane is bustling around full of the joys of the season.   I’m lying on the chaise longue reading the post and biting my tongue.

It seems that we now have to celebrate Christmas.  For the first time ever I have had to get a tree.  This is an unnecessary expenditure that I cannot afford, but Jane said that everyone is doing it.

I pointed out several people that have not bothered with a tree but Jane mentioned many who have and said that I would not want to be left behind, whereas the reverse is true.

Without a castle and with a job I am already considered an oddity, so I enjoy breaking some Old Vampire social conventions merely because I can get away with it.

I also have to get her a present for Boxing Day, as is appropriate for servants.

I have no idea what to buy her and have to put up with her happy chatter as she tinkles the balls on the tree with her feather duster.  I am sure these do not need to be dusted, especially not twice a week.

I have dropped some hints but unfortunately she seems impervious to them and I have to fall back on mind-reading, which vampires have as much skill in as humans.

I spend a lot of time at my club to get away from the relentless Christmas chatter I face at work and now at home as well.

Thankfully, it has absolutely no decorations and the butler would be shocked if you mentioned Christmas.

I can sink into a wing-backed chair and footstool with the newspaper and a drink for a few hours and forget Christmas exists.

Glossary

Bonded Wedding Old Vampire marriage for political reasons

Common Status the point at where an Old Vampire becomes a real Vampire

Debutante Vampires before Dracula came out, vampires who had been newly turned vampire were taught the rules of society.  They then “came out” when they were deemed presentable to vampire society as debutantes.  They are the only Old Vampires who have a zero level of Status and are acceptable.

The Committee see The Committee to Regulate Non-Human Activity

The Committee to Regulate Non-Human Activity a committee that meets monthly and talks about affairs to do with werewolves, vampires and humans

Fence an Old Vampire fight in which they fight to the first blood using fencing

The Hunters see Vampire Hunters

Negatives Old Vampires with zero or negative points of Status.

New Vampires vampires who do not want to be Old Vampires, often live as Goths and hold down jobs.  This started after Dracula came out.

Notice the Status Keeper serves a Notice on an Old Vampire whose Status has reduced to zero that they are in danger of becoming a Negative

Obligation when one vampire is under an obligation from another s/he has to do as they say

Old Vampires vampires who are polite society.  Either turned vampire before Dracula came out or were turned after by an Old Vampire and decided to join the Old Vampires.

Parent the vampire who brought you up (if you are an Old Vampire) in polite society

The Ruler’s Men people employed by The Ruler to do anything she or he asks

Shun a vampire who has committed a sex crime is shunned on their release

Sire the vampire who made you a vampire

Status a ranking system which denotes whether you are an acceptable member of Old Vampire society, which is if you have plus points of status.  See Negatives and Thousands

Status Keeper the Old Vampire in charge of the Status points

Thousands Old Vampires whose Status is over a hundred points

Vampire Hunters New vampires who hunt down those vampires who have committed crimes

Vampire Servants servants who are vampires themselves.  Mostly Old Vampires, one of their functions is to repeat information and gossip to the Old Vampires they serve

Walk into the sun a euphemism for suicide

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